Married at 19.

The amount of times Thorran proposed to me and everyone had a good laugh and joke about it, Nobody thought it was serious. Until the last time he proposed to me, outside a bloody co op- but it was the place we first met.

Thorran had me on social media years before we met, he had photos of me saved on his phone (yep, that sounds a little weird). He got my number of a friend, and was ‘harassing’ me with calls. Until i finally decided to meet him. My first thoughts was, yeah he is kinda good looking, i didn’t expect it, he’s such a basic looking person but bloody gorgeous at the same time. I never met anybody quiet like him, everything around him was different, his life, his friends, it was a breath of fresh air from the boys i was used to dating. We got together that day that we met 16/03/2015- nearly 5 years ago now. We was very public from that moment, and that wasn’t a good thing, people didn’t like me and tried everything to split us. and he gave into a bit of that attention. We was off and on, i can’t say our relationship was perfect, because we had serious problems, and anyone that followed me back then know all about it. But we always some how got through it, i thought how can someone who tried so hard to impress me, then suddenly not want me? I think it was the first time i truly felt the pain, after only having one serious relationship before him, i was ready to give up altogether.

When we got together we knew what we both wanted, young family, loads of kids, marriage. We got onto that right away, got pregnant pretty quickly, even used pills to help conceive, So with a rocky one year, everything got fine when kaylen was around 2 months old. That’s the last time we split. Yep, thats when he last proposed, and agreed to get married this time, everything felt so different at this point, i felt for the first time secure in a relationship, that nobody could break. Not like before when i didn’t know what the next day could bring. I have never believed people can change. But this was proof they could. We never fell out of love before, we just got off track a little, Madness things knowing we was about to become parents.

Planning the wedding was pretty simple. managed to do it all on my own. He rang the places up, went to make payments, i just did all the searching. We worked as a team. We didn’t have no money, we was on benefits, relaying just on that to get us married.. people still to this day asked how we did it. Think it took us just 3 months to save and make it happen. Basic reception, no fancy cars, family doing photography, but managed to get the place i needed our wedding do.. the same place my parents had there’s. Just a lovely function room with a buffet and a DJ. Some homemade sweet cones for the kids, a asda cake and we was all good. I think about our wedding day a lot, things i wish we could have had. But the only thing that mattered was the vows we made to each other, and how everyday i look at Thorran and still feel the way i did back then. I’d love to renew our vows one day, with both our boys there- kaylen had just turned one, i’d love them to both remember it!

I always had a lot of messages back in the day, relationship advice, i would have told you dump them if they mess you about. But the truth is, i didn’t stick to my own advice, yeah i could have ended up wasting years on him. But i didn’t. I gave him patience, I gave him time and chances to see what would happen, and i looked stupid doing so, but i am so glad i did.

We was young, but i wouldn’t change it.